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Welcome to the Information Site for

Psychotherapy,  Counselling, Coaching,  Training
& Professional Speaking


We have moved during December 2018: The Head Office of the Selfgrow Development Group is now in Burgundy Estate, in Cape Town, South Africa, and CONSULTING ROOMS for psychotherapy, coaching and training are at West Beach Clinic, Sandown Road, Blouberg Sands, 7441 Cape Town, South Africa.  Clinical Psychologist Reinette Steyn and the Selfgrow group may be contacted, for appointments, queries about Selfgrow  services, or quotes only, by leaving a voice message at [new number]:
Tel +27  021  558-4697      [Office hours – GMT +2: 09:00-17:00]
or via email [for persons outside South Africa / Skype calls] at
bookings@selfgrow.co.za .
Please note that email is NOT checked  on a daily basis; please use phone for emergencies/ urgent matters.

I hope you will find browsing the site enjoyable and useful!  There are pages on Psychotherapy, Life Coaching, Corporate and Group Skills Training, Professional/Motivational Speaking, Mind Magic, and many articles about different aspects of Psychological health, growth, development and empowerment…  Have a look at the Articles [on the “Articles List” link] which we’ll update regularly.  You are welcome to register on site for our informative free monthly email newsletter.

Summaries of Pages foci:


Reinette is a registered Clinical Psychologist and Psychotherapist, using an Integrative approach to psychotherapy, incorporating Psychoanalytic insight, with Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, Hypnosis and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing [EMDR].  This page contains FAQ’s and Articles on diverse fields of interest and use to the community, from specific syndromes like Panic or Anxiety Attacks and Phobias; Personality Disorders, or Sleep Disorders; and information about, for instance, Sexual Orientation, Hypnotic and Mind Power techniques, Stress and pain Management, Trauma and Grief.

Life Coaching

Coaching is aimed at helping individuals determine the level of effectiveness of their present level of functioning in one or more specific areas of their life, in order to help them set and achieve very specific goals for a specified outcome time, so as to perform more effectively.  Coaching is “client-agenda driven” but the coach – like the coach of a sports team – has the obligation to focus on ways of improving performance and is not a passive listener or supporter of resistance to change.  Coaching is time-bound and goal-orientated, and can focus on different areas achievement, for instance, work skills or performance, interpersonal skills, health habits, financial health, etc.



Group Training sessions are an effective way to increase group skills or motivation or interaction, as everybody acquires the same information and can utilise interactive exercises to develop and hone necessary skills.  Training can occur in public [general] or closed/corporate group settings, and cover such diverse skills as Thinking Skills, Brain Power, Team Building, Conflict Resolution, Presentation Skills, Creativity, Problem-Solving, Change Management, or Stress Management.
Facilitation sessions are also provided for, e.g. Strategic Planning meetings, or other Executive needs.
Reinette has achieved the highest level of Communication and Leadership in the Toastmasters International organisation, namely that of Distinguished Toastmaster.  She is also a Trainer for the Toastmasters Leadership Institute, and has taught and lectured at tertiary and secondary education facilities.

Professional Speaking


Reinette, aka Ret Steyn, presents inspirational and motivational speeches on a variety of topics, from insights gained from the study of the Neuropsychology of brain/mind, or information about the processes involve in the material universe, to her experiences as a teacher, actress/singer, director and psychologist, and the ability of human beings to overcome obstacles and disabilities.  She has also won several humorous speech contests, produced plays and musicals, has appeared on various radio shows, and is a member of the Professional Speakers Association of South Africa and the Toastmasters Speakers Bureau.  Ret was also a voice and acting coach.


Mind Magic


From time to time we will add some interesting information and fun exercises about the mind and how it works.
Watch this space every few weeks for new material!

We’ve added a special page for the Meditation Timer…  Enjoy a brief or longer relaxation or focus time while listening to beautiful music of your choice when you click on this link:



Media & Reviews


Summaries, reviews, and transcripts of Reinette’s presentations on radio or for groups like the Professionsal Speakers Association of Southern Africa (PSASA) or the South African Society for Clinical Hypnosis (SASCH) may be viewed here.


About Empowerment & Development of the Self


Not every problem benefits from the same solution.  Not every person needs the same assistance or mentorship, and people may need different types of assistance at different times in their lives.

We are fortunate now to be able to encounter therapeutic input from many sources, such as presentations on DVD or CD [e.g. The Secret;  What the Bleep do we know; Mystery of Water] books on CD [e.g. The Power of Intention by Dr Wayne Dyer], books on other methods of healing through changing how we think [e.g. Law of Attraction], e-books [e.g. Spiritual Marketing by Joe Vitale], and YouTube.

Some people are relatively healthy and successful, but want to develop greater skills and resources, or want assistance in making appropriate decisions in a specific situation.  Some people function very well in one or more areas of their life, such as work or physical fitness, but they lack skills in others, like relationships.  Some need motivation; some need information; some need support or direction; some need a space to heal…

Some of us are inspired by, for instance, a Motivational / Inspirational Speaker, to begin or resume a healing or goal-directed journey.  Some need individual attention in, for instance, a formalised Coaching programme, whereas others benefit more from group Training situations.  These are also often helpful in creating greater “Corporate Health” when a company’s employees, or management group, experience interactive applications of new or improved skills.

Some people require Transformative Psychotherapy of some kind.  This might be a Psychoanalytically-Orientated Psychotherapy, like Self Psychology, or a Phenomenological-Humanist approach, or Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy [CBT], or Integrative Psychotherapy which uses combinations various techniques or approaches for different needs of clients, inclusive of fast working techniques like Hypnosis or Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing [EMDR].

Some formalised psychotherapy techniques have been around for more than a hundred years, some have had periods of popularity, some are inappropriate for certain disorders, and some are relatively new but well researched.  Some Group Therapy techniques are very valuable, such as Psychodrama or Art Therapy.  Many “weird and wonderful” approaches have also appeared, some of which introduced new techniques that are often very

useful and are integrated within other approaches.

What works for one person may not be effective for another.  One factor common to success in various kinds of intervention, is a person’s readiness to change.  Unfortunately, many people want the world, or someone else, or their circumstances, to change so that they can be more comfortable.

Psychotherapists, Coaches, Mentors, and Trainers don’t generally lay claim to such magical abilities.  But perhaps we can motivate people to want to change, or not to fear change.  And then the healing or growth process can


Trauma of some kind very often underlies the symptoms that give rise to distress, or the ineffective ways people have developed to cope with distress.  Trauma symptoms, sometimes identified as Chronic Traumatic Stress Disorder, or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder [PTSD], are sometimes missed because the defences against the effects of the traumatic experience/s develop over time into a pattern that may be identified as a different syndrome, like Depression, or an Anxiety Disorder.  People suffering from one or more phobia/s, for instance, often find that one or more previous traumatic experiences lie at the root of the problem.  While using, for instance, Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy [CBT] may give them some control over the symptom-related behaviour/s, they may gain greater emotional freedom when a de-briefing technique, like EMDR, is added to the treatment protocol.

There are many ways to access and develop the inherent and often hidden resources of the human mind.  The search for self-fulfilment, happiness and success has spanned all the ages of human development.  At Selfgrow.co.za, working from an Integrative approach, we try to match the best methods of therapy, coaching, training and motivation for the growth or healing needs expressed by our clients.  We also refer, where necessary, to expert affiliates, who can advise on specific problems, for instance, in Finance, or Health.

What is Therapy?


The word “therapy” [from the Greek word terapeuó] and the root word “heal” in “healing” or “health” [from the Old English word haêlt or halen] both refer to making whole [again], or curing [toughening; making resilient].  The implication is that people become fragile, or vulnerable, or rigid and maladapted to what their optimal survival demands, through some cause.
In social settings we use words like “[nervous] breakdown”, “falling apart”, “stuck”, “helpless”, “controlling”, “chaotic”, “all over the place”, “devastated”, “falling to pieces”, “vulnerable”, “hurt”, etc, to describe states or personalities that do not cope optimally with the life stress they encounter.

In Psychology terms like “fragmented” or “weak” – as in “weak ego boundaries”, may be used for the deficits that prevent optimal functioning, and therapists would also indicate “limited resources” or “poor support”, for instance, to indicate the level of challenge for an individual or group.

Conversely, terms like “together”, “grounded”, “adaptable”, “strong”, “resourceful” or even “pull yourself together!” are used for people who seem to succeed in attaining happiness and success despite stress.  The implication for outcome goals in psycho-therapeutic intervention of any kind, is that people can be helped to become more “together” and “resilient” so that they no longer are victims of stressors or of their fixed patterns of “defensive” [or “coping”] behaviours, which were developed in crises long ago and are not appropriate to current situations.

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